Sunday, September 20, 2009

The Removal

The surgery was performed on Monday. I freaked out a little bit, but all in all, it went ok. They were only able to remove one tumor. They were not able to find the other one. I am a little freaked about this. Even though it did not show up as active on the PET scan, it still could be cancerous. And that, my friends, is a little scary.

At this time the plan is to go back to Houston in November for a repeat PET scan and appointment with the Dr. I am not sure I am very fond of this plan. That just seems like a lot of wait time. What if it actually is active and starts spreading? The thought of that actually brings tears to my eyes. These are not things that a 31 year old mother should be worrying about. It's not fair. I have two beautiful children that need and deserve to have their mommy. This whole situation just makes me so damn angry.

Before we left Houston they did a blood test to see if I had a certain protein in my blood for a melanoma trial vaccine. Of course, I do not contain the protein. The test results also came back on what they removed and it came back as melanoma-of course! I knew that it would come back as cancer, but it's still a bit of blow to hear it out loud. After 6 very, very awful rounds of chemo, it's hard to believe that I still have cancer in my body. Nothing about this seems very fair. Not fair at all.

18 comments:

Chelle said...

Oh, Heather, I am so sorry honey. You're absolutely right...it's not fair. Not fair at all.

My family and I are keeping you in our prayers and thoughts always.

Lindsay said...

oo heather this makes my heart heavy! I am glad they got the one.. wish they could have found the last one!! I will be praying for peace for you over the next few months while you wait to go back to Houston! Also that that stupid cancer goes away!!

Happiness Is... said...

I am so sorry that these concerns remain - you're right that this is not fair at all. Keep fighting the good fight, though...and you have lots of people praying for you.

Shana said...

You are right. Not fair at all. Still on Team Heather, though! Love you hon and enjoy your time with your babies!!! They are lucky to have you as their mommy!

Evansmom said...

You are right = it isn't fair. Will keep you in my thoughts.

Hope said...

You're right about all of it. You should not be fighting cencer and worrying about whether your children will have a mother in 10 years. You have every right to be angry. I'm angry for you.

But, you know what? You will beat this. You will be here for your children and their children. I am forever faithful that you will win this battle.

Christy said...

Well fuck! So sorry friend.

Chris said...

So sorry to hear that, Heather. I will continue to pray for you. In the meantime, try to enjoy your family and not worry to much. Hugs to you!

thetoepfertimes said...

Oh, so sorry to hear this. It's not fair at all! You should be done! At least the pet scan was negative this time and they got the tumor out. We'll keep praying that the future scans are negative.

Jodi Clements said...

I wish their was something I could do to make this all go away. Just remerember God doesnot give you something you can't handle. If there is anything I can do just let me know.

Jodi Clements

Becks said...

Heather i am so sorry, that is very very tough! It really isnt fair for you and your babies. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it all better for you.

Marsha said...

Heather Dawn I love you so much. Mom

Clare said...

I wish that the removal had gone better, I am glad they got one. i am sure it is so scary to hear the cancer word, it makes all of us worry. thinking of you, and i hope that everything will continue to improve from now until nov.

The Kitchen said...

Heather - I am so sorry you are enduring this now - you are so right - IT IS NOT FAIR!!!!

PLEASE let me know what I can do to help you all - I am just about 3 miles from MD Anderson and am happy to bring dinner, converstaion - whatever is needed and wanted!
XOXOXOXO

fortyb4forty said...

You have been in my thoughts and prayers. I can't imagine how angry and frustrated this must make you feel.
I will continue praying!

Heather said...

Well that just sucks!! I'm so sorry that the removal didn't go as well as we wanted, but PLEASE don't lose hope. Your babies have a fantastic mother and your grandbabies will know her well too!!! Thinking about you guys!!

Hailey said...

Praying!

Anonymous said...

Heather,

No, this isn't fair----you and Neil don't deserve this. But sometimes you worry about things so much, and it doesn't happen.

There's no quitting---Aunt Frances has always said "God is testing you". G'pa says "Why is he always picking on us?" You know G'pa!!

Neil is feeling better now after the radiation and is to have surgery---not sure just when.

Good luck to us all!!!
Love-Grandma

 
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